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Literature Text
the first to come around
her intent-filled eyes
and lustrous smile.
that smile...
the sense of beginning.
a new found respect for
my heart,
and hers.
her hands felt like
little clouds from heaven,
so soft
and serene.
far from appearance
was personality.
she took it all in,
like a camera does
the world.
her ideas were sugar-filled
and a treat to me.
always thinking,
always wondering.
a calm sense of humor,
unlike most people.
a pearl in the ocean,
i must admit.
and yet...
i expected.
the first to come
was the first to go.
oh, the common
cognition.
the first that came around
with intent-filled eyes
and a lustrous smile.
oh, that smile...
her intent-filled eyes
and lustrous smile.
that smile...
the sense of beginning.
a new found respect for
my heart,
and hers.
her hands felt like
little clouds from heaven,
so soft
and serene.
far from appearance
was personality.
she took it all in,
like a camera does
the world.
her ideas were sugar-filled
and a treat to me.
always thinking,
always wondering.
a calm sense of humor,
unlike most people.
a pearl in the ocean,
i must admit.
and yet...
i expected.
the first to come
was the first to go.
oh, the common
cognition.
the first that came around
with intent-filled eyes
and a lustrous smile.
oh, that smile...
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Umm... mood is in a writing mood.
This is based around my first love. Felt like writing about romance.... thanks to Lady Gaga. xDD
I give =RawEm0tion permission to use this if they so please.
This is based around my first love. Felt like writing about romance.... thanks to Lady Gaga. xDD
I give =RawEm0tion permission to use this if they so please.
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Comments5
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"a pearl in the ocean,
i must admit.
and yet...
i expected.
the first to come
was the first to go.
oh, the common
cognition.
the first that came around
with intent-filled eyes
and a lustrous smile.
oh, that smile... "
This part sounds rather confusing... What did the poet expect? Does he expect the first one to come to be the first one to leave? If not, then I think some kind of separation between the lines "i expected" and "the first to come" (like an extra space) would make things clearer.
Not bad, I like how you used repetition for the ending (:
i must admit.
and yet...
i expected.
the first to come
was the first to go.
oh, the common
cognition.
the first that came around
with intent-filled eyes
and a lustrous smile.
oh, that smile... "
This part sounds rather confusing... What did the poet expect? Does he expect the first one to come to be the first one to leave? If not, then I think some kind of separation between the lines "i expected" and "the first to come" (like an extra space) would make things clearer.
Not bad, I like how you used repetition for the ending (: